Feelings....whoa,whoa,whoa...feelings...

Ok...enough already...I know, I know...
what is it about me?
why is it that I can feel ok somedays,
even happy...
and others, not so good.

How is it that I can have so many different feelings going through me at once?
But also know that the underlying foundation of my soul is now sadness...
When I look in the mirror, and look at my eyes, I see someone filled with unhappiness.
I see someone who lookes tired, confused, and overwhelmed.
But I still have to put on my game~face, and try to be happy for everyone.
I don't want my daughters to see me as a loser.
Sometimes I just don't think I can do this.
And I know I have to.

Its hard to still (somewhat) care deep-deep down,
and pretend that you don't.
Or even worse...
know that you shouldn't.